In the wise words from Leo and Stitch, family means that nobody is left out or left behind. It is very common for people to feel left out in families, especially when the family is a big family or if there is more than one child in the family. Even in the tightest and closed of families, sibling rivalry and jealousy is unfortunately extremely common in today's society. Whether your family consists of your parents, your other half, your children, your grandparents or your extended family, for some people cannot help how they feel. For myself, for many years I have compared myself to my younger sister and thought that I wanted to be like her. In a weird way I almost looked up to her. In the back of my head I always knew that both of my parents loved us both equally, that they would do anything for the both of us and that we are a tight family unit that come together when life gets tough.
I don't know what started these feelings and thoughts that I was the odd one out or that I was left out, but from counselling and expressing my feelings with my family, I can now see that I was always loved. That these feeling of isolation was just in my head. That I had focused on every tiny idea to make a case that I was the odd ball in the family. For many years, this did put a strain on my relationship with my sister and my parents, which made me believe in these crazy thoughts in my head. It is only recently from sharing these thoughts with my family that we have become even closer. That they are understanding my mental health issues and the thoughts and situations I have been thinking and putting together in my head all these years. I had avoided the conversation with my family for months. I knew how it sounded and how my feelings could hurt my parents. The rational side of my brain knew that these thoughts were just the imagination running wild in my brain, that my parents gave us both equal opportunities, but for some reason the rational side of me wasn't enough to shake away these feelings. Speaking to the family I am more aware of how my anxiety works. I can pin point areas that before I would have made into even bigger situations for myself and worried about for months on end. Family is the most important group that you will ever be apart of. As I said, no matter who is in your family and what your idea of family is, cherish every single day you have with your family. If you feel low, down, like you are being left out or that a situation did not fit right with you then address your family straight away. Do not do what I did and keep things to myself, and let them manifest for years which made the situations in my head ten times worse then they actually were. Once your family life is in a good place, the rest should fall into place. I don't look at what has happened to me as a burden, it has brought me a lot closer to my family and has made me realize how lucky and grateful I am to have a crazy bunch of people I can call my family and my rocks. If you have ever felt the same way I did or you have similar feelings now, don't be afraid talk to your family but remember they are there to love and support you, even if you can't see that right now, you will soon. For people witnessing their family members feeling like this, I know it is difficult but try not to get angry or upset. They know you love them as much as you love the rest of your family, however they are struggling to see it, that is not your fault or theirs, they just have to find the positive side to life again, be patient and they will soon become their-selves again. Em x
1 Comment
megan
6/20/2015 03:46:46 am
Friends will come and go, but family will always be there. Xxx
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April 2018
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