Hi Everyone! Happy Friday! It is finally the weekend after a very very long week! I have been really busy between baby sitting, exercising, getting back into my Waist A-Weigh Healthy eating plan, doing my online course etc. With only seven weeks until my family holiday,there was no better way to spend my Friday than a girl's shopping day! But first I spent the morning with the two men in my life - Mark and my little cousin Tom. In total I spent about eight hours walking around busy shopping centres' ( I know poor me, imagine the pain having to shop!). Now that I am home and having a good cup of tea, I am looking back on today's shopping trip fondly. Not only with my amazing purchases and a lovely girlie lunch out, but at how far I have come in the past two months. As you are all aware by now, I have suffered hugely with aniexty attacks in crowds over the past couple of years. It got to the stage where I could not go into Penny's without having to leave five minutes later feeling so weak and frightened due to the crowds. Today has shown me how far I have come. For a lot of people a day out in the shops is far from a chore and is not a big ordeal, but for me, unfortunately that is what shopping trips became. For those of you who know me well you all know that I LOVE fashion!! I am that person who gets excited by the new issue of Vogue, who categorises her wardrobe by season, colour and trend, who NEVER throws out an item of clothing for fear that it will come back into fashion in the future and that same person who HATES missing an Xpose episode. So for me not being able to enjoy shopping or socializing, showed me just how much my aniexty was winning. For the first time in a long time, no thoughts of crowds, aniexty or bad thoughts crossed my mind during the day. I wasn't worried about the crowds or about anything going wrong during the day, I just enjoyed myself and came home with a lot of penny's bags! Some people may think that this is silly, but as I said, for me it was a big deal for me to forget about everything and to enjoy the buzz of the sales. I feel like I am finally gaining some control back of my life, that I can do normal things and that I will some day feel not just 70% back to myself but 100% back to normal. Mark surprised me with an Alex and Ani Bangle today and on it is 'Everything happens for a reason', which describes y attitude to life these days,although things may not work out the way you thought they would, everything that happens in our lives happens for a reason! So if you ever feel like like giving up, remember that you have the power to change the situation and that one day you will hopefully look back at this time and see how far you have grown! Night night guys! Em <3 X
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This page is to keep you all up to date on where I am on my journey, what I am up to and general chat! Archives
April 2018
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